Hey guys, I am secretly a Bioware employee and I have decided to release new info on Mass Effect 3! First off, you won't be able to play as Commander Shepard this time. Instead, you get to play as this relatively unknown character who escaped from his homeworld with his/her family after being attacked by the reapers. You can only choose one background. However, the reapers will only be a side threat and the actual main villain will be revealed only near the end for some apparent reason. Did you like to travel space visiting hundreds of different planets? Well sorry, we decided to limit you to a relatively small planet, it's for the story. Don't worry though, we're going to copy and paste multiple locations so it seems bigger. Also, we decided to change the look of Mass Effect and go with a blander, gray-hued style. The combat has also been revamped, to make it less complicated we made it so that you can win just by button mashing; it will be a lot more actiony. As for companions, most of them will be new but there will be a few from previous games that were less memorable and inconspicuous. Ever wanted to have a homosexual relationship with a strait character or vice-versa? Well now they're all bisexual! We decided that instead of making different characters with personalities that match their sexual preferences, it would just be easier *ahem* it would just make the story better if they were all bisexual.

Also we're changing the name to Mass Age III.

Also its now in a fantasy setting.

If you can't tell by now, that was a joke. A very weak joke. Fire away.

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